from the labs of science to the bodies of men.
One of the most crucial things about living with HIV is taking medication.
There is a whole list of medications now available to people in the west to help people living with HIV to continue to keep living.
Sounds good? Ill let you in on something.
I first started taking the meds seven years ago. I was on the brink. My viral load was 1 million 500 thousand. That means for every 10 mls of my blood there existed 1500000 copies of HIV. I had 70 t cells. I had lost about 10 kgs in weight. I was suffering from periodic trans iscemic attacks (or mini strokes) and my tongue was covered in Oral Hairy Leukoplakia. All signs my immune system was under huge attack.
It was a huge battle for me to start meds. I was totally against them. They were toxic, a sign that I was dying, an admission that something was wrong. I was a vegetarian, I took vitamins by the handful, herbs and potions that seemed to consume my existence. There was no way that I was going to poison my body with the very pills that had killed many people before me.
AZT was given to people with HIV in the 80's at very highly toxic levels. There was a scare going on in the world noone knew what was happening and people were crying out for modern science to help. Dont worry about the trials there wasnt time. It killed alot of people needlessly.
I went to my doctor. She told me I needed to take them or die. That was my alternative. No choice. Well I either took them or died.
I took them. Quickly, amazingly even to myself my health returned slowly. With that came the side effects. Nausea, sweeping nausea like my whole insides was coming out. Headaches and diarreha sitting on the toilet 7, 8, 9, 10 times a day. But my health was coming back.. the crucial bloods were showing immune restoration. But I felt like shit. So I changed pills. Over and over again, I have changed pills. I really am lucky I have that option.
So its been seven years Ive been on medication. Seven years until last year. There is now a test called resistance. It measures the virus, and cross checks it against the medications to see if the virus has mutated so that the meds dont work anymore. They arent effective against the virus. It changes. The sucker learns quickly how to survive. So for a period of 6 months I stopped medication. I had supposedly run out of options.
My body quickly responded to the lack of medication. My viral load shot up, the tongue again became coated and I felt tired. More tired than I had ever felt. My body was under attack.
Ive started medication again. Im putting up with the side effects. I dont want to let go of this yet. There is much more I need to accomplish.
Im lucky. There are people who are resistant. Cant take anything. It just doesnt work. There are people who cant afford medication. In some countries like the USA they cost over $1000 a month. In some countries like Africa they arent available at all. Im lucky. Ive got a chance to make it. And im going to take it by the horns and run with it.
Im going to watch the rest of Angels in America now. It rained alot tonight. There was a thunderstorm. The air is clear. The energy is coming back to normal.